What Not To Do With Cucumbers

I planted one lonely cucumber plant.  This spring I debated whether or not that was a good idea, you know, just in case the one plant dies...then you've got a backup. 

Whoooo boy.  Am I sure glad I only planted one cucumber.  That sucker is prolific.  I'm pretty sure there is a law of physics where you have to have at least 4 cucumbers on your kitchen counter at a time.

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I've given cucumbers to the food pantry, my best friend, my husband's best friend, and Blockette's teacher.  I still have an overabundance.  Cucumbers up the wazoo.

What on earth was I going to do with all these cucumbers?  I did a search online and found this recipe for a cucumber drink.  It called for a pound of cucumber, 1/2 c lime, 1 1/4c mint, 1/2 c sugar and 1 c water.

Long story short, you make a simple syrup out of the sugar and water, then dump it and all the other ingredients into a blender and puree.  After straining, you then add 3 more cups of water. 

The recipe said to leave the skins on.  That the skins would give the drink a lovely green color.  Um no.  It made the drink a pukey green color.  That was problem number one.

Problem number two was my mint had gone to seed.  I had a dilly of a time trying to get a cups worth of mint. And then there was the tiny matter of a giant moth that hid inside the mint I brought outside.  I mean it wasn't Mothra, but it wasn't one of those dainty white ones.  Think Silence of the Lambs.  Yeah.  There was lots of screaming. 

The third issue was that I realized my lime juice had gone bad.  So I mixed everything up without that.  I tested the drink to see how it was before I went out and bought some lime juice.  It tasted...ok, but it seemed like it would be a lot better with the lime.

So Blockette and I headed out to the store where I purchased some non-brown non-lumpy lime juice, which I added to my cucumber drink.

I poured the three of us each a glass.

We all took a sip and declared it "not bad."  Then we had another sip.  My family was silent.  (Yeah.  They are some smart peeps.)  They all looked at me.  Blinking.  I quietly grabbed their glasses and dumped their contents down the drain, along with the remaining gunk in the pitcher. 

Then my husband said, "Honey?  Never EVER make that again."

Done. And. Done.

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(Although, I think if I used better mint and peeled the cucumber...Kidding honey!  Just kidding!)